Brother Lustig

There was once a great war, and when it ended, many soldiers were discharged. Brother Lustig also got his dismissal, but nothing except a small loaf of army bread and four kreuzers in money, and with that he set off. St.

Peter, however, had placed himself in his way in the shape of a poor beggar, and when Brother Lustig came up, he asked for alms. Brother Lustig replied, "Dear beggar, what can I give you?

I have been a soldier and have received my dismissal, and have nothing but this little loaf of bread and four kreuzers. When that is gone, I will have to beg like you. Still, I will give you something." Then he divided the loaf into four parts and gave one part and one kreuzer to the apostle.

St. Peter thanked him, went on, and threw himself again in the soldier's way as a beggar, but in a different shape. When Brother Lustig came up, he begged again. Brother Lustig spoke as before and gave him another quarter of the loaf and another kreuzer. St.

Peter thanked him and went on, but for the third time he placed himself in another shape as a beggar on the road and spoke to Brother Lustig. Brother Lustig gave him the third quarter of the bread and the third kreuzer. St.

Peter thanked him, and Brother Lustig went on with just a quarter of the loaf and one kreuzer. He went into an inn, ate the bread, and ordered a kreuzer's worth of beer. When he had drunk it, he journeyed on. Then St.

Peter, who had taken the form of a discharged soldier, met him and said, "Good day, comrade. Can you give me a bit of bread and a kreuzer for a drink?" "Where am I to get it?" answered Brother Lustig.

"I have been discharged and got nothing but a loaf of bread and four kreuzers. I met three beggars on the road and gave each of them a quarter of my bread and one kreuzer. The last quarter I ate in the inn, and I had a drink with the last kreuzer.

Now my pockets are empty. If you also have nothing, we can go begging together." "No," answered St. Peter, "we don't need to do that. I know a little about medicine, and I can soon earn what I need." "Indeed," said Brother Lustig, "I know nothing about that, so I must go and beg alone." "Just come with me," said St.

Peter, "and if I earn anything, you shall have half of it." "All right," said Brother Lustig, so they went together.

Then they came to a peasant's house where they heard loud weeping and cries. They went in, and there the husband was lying sick to death, very close to his end, and his wife was crying and weeping loudly. "Stop that howling and crying," said St. Peter.

"I will make the man well again." He took a salve out of his pocket and healed the sick man in a moment, so that he could get up and was perfectly healthy. In great delight the man and his wife said, "How can we reward you?

What shall we give you?" But St. Peter would take nothing, and the more the peasants offered him, the more he refused. Brother Lustig, however, nudged St. Peter and said, "Take something; we certainly need it." At last the woman brought a lamb and said St.

Peter really must take it, but he would not. Then Brother Lustig poked him in the side and said, "Take it, you fool; we need it badly!" Then St. Peter finally said, "Well, I will take the lamb, but I won't carry it.

If you insist, you must carry it." "That's nothing," said Brother Lustig. "I'll easily carry it," and he took it on his shoulder. Then they left and came to a wood, but Brother Lustig began to feel the lamb heavy, and he was hungry, so he said to St.

Peter, "Look, this is a good place. We could cook the lamb here and eat it." "As you like," answered St. Peter, "but I can't have anything to do with the cooking. If you want to cook, there is a kettle.

In the meantime, I'll walk around a bit until it is ready. But you must not start eating until I come back. I will come at the right time." "Well, go then," said Brother Lustig. "I know how to cook; I'll manage." Then St.

Peter went away, and Brother Lustig killed the lamb, lit a fire, threw the meat into the kettle, and boiled it. The lamb was quite ready, and St. Peter had not come back, so Brother Lustig took it out of the kettle, cut it up, and found the heart.

"That's said to be the best part," he said, and tasted it, but in the end he ate it all up. At last St. Peter returned and said, "You may eat the whole lamb yourself; I only want the heart.

Give me that." Then Brother Lustig took a knife and fork and pretended to look anxiously among the lamb's meat, but not to find the heart, and at last he said abruptly, "There is none here." "But where can it be?" said the apostle. "I don't know," replied Brother Lustig.

"But look, what fools we both are to look for the lamb's heart when neither of us remembers that a lamb has no heart!" "Oh," said St. Peter, "that's something new! Every animal has a heart.

Why would a lamb have none?" "No, be sure, my brother," said Brother Lustig, "a lamb has no heart. Just think about it seriously, and you will see that it really has none." "Well, it's all right," said St. Peter.

"If there is no heart, then I don't want any of the lamb. You may eat it alone." "What I can't eat now, I'll carry away in my knapsack," said Brother Lustig, and he ate half the lamb and put the rest in his knapsack.

They went on, and then St. Peter caused a great stream of water to flow right across their path, and they had to cross it. St. Peter said, "You go first." "No," answered Brother Lustig, "you must go first," and he thought, "If the water is too deep, I will stay behind." Then St.

Peter strode through it, and the water only reached his knee. So Brother Lustig began to cross too, but the water grew deeper and reached his throat. Then he cried, "Brother, help me!" St. Peter said, "Will you confess that you ate the lamb's heart?" "No," said he, "I have not eaten it." Then the water grew deeper still and rose to his mouth.

"Help me, brother," cried the soldier. St. Peter said, "Will you confess that you ate the lamb's heart?" "No," he replied, "I have not eaten it." St. Peter, however, would not let him drown, but made the water go down and helped him across.

Then they journeyed on and came to a kingdom where they heard that the king's daughter was lying sick to death. "Hollo, brother!" said the soldier to St. Peter. "This is a chance for us. If we can heal her, we will be set for life!" But St.

Peter was not half quick enough for him. "Come on, lift your legs, my dear brother," he said, "so we can get there in time." But St. Peter walked slower and slower, even though Brother Lustig did all he could to push him on.

At last they heard that the princess was dead. "Now we are finished!" said Brother Lustig. "That comes from your sleepy walking!" "Just be quiet," answered St. Peter. "I can do more than cure sick people; I can bring the dead back to life." "Well, if you can do that," said Brother Lustig, "it's all right, but you should earn at least half the kingdom for us with it." Then they went to the royal palace, where everyone was in great grief.

St. Peter told the king that he would bring his daughter back to life. He was taken to her and said, "Bring me a kettle and some water." When that was brought, he told everyone to leave and allowed no one to stay except Brother Lustig.

Then he cut off all of the dead girl's limbs, threw them in the water, lit a fire under the kettle, and boiled them. When the flesh had fallen away from the bones, he took out the beautiful white bones and laid them on a table, arranging them in their natural order.

When he had done that, he stepped forward and said three times, "In the name of the holy Trinity, dead woman, arise." At the third time, the princess stood up, alive, healthy, and beautiful. Then the king was overjoyed and said to St. Peter, "Ask for your reward.

Even if it were half my kingdom, I would give it to you." But St. Peter said, "I want nothing for it." "Oh, you fool!" thought Brother Lustig to himself, and he nudged his comrade's side and said, "Don't be so stupid! If you don't need anything, I do." St.

Peter, however, would have nothing. But when the king saw that the other wanted something, he ordered his treasurer to fill Brother Lustig's knapsack with gold. Then they went on their way, and when they came to a forest, St.

Peter said to Brother Lustig, "Now we will divide the gold." "Yes," he replied, "we will." So St. Peter divided the gold into three heaps. Brother Lustig thought to himself, "What crazy idea does he have now? He is making three shares, and there are only two of us!" But St.

Peter said, "I have divided it exactly. There is one share for me, one for you, and one for him who ate the lamb's heart." "Oh, I ate that!" replied Brother Lustig, and hastily swept up the gold. "You can trust what I say." "But how can that be true," said St.

Peter, "when a lamb has no heart?" "Eh, what, brother, what are you thinking? Lambs have hearts like other animals. Why should only they have none?" "Well, so be it," said St. Peter. "Keep the gold for yourself, but I will stay with you no longer.

I will go my way alone." "As you like, dear brother," answered Brother Lustig. "Farewell."

Then St. Peter went a different road. Brother Lustig thought, "It's a good thing he has gone off. He is certainly a strange saint." Now he had plenty of money, but he did not know how to manage it.

He squandered it, gave it away, and after some time he had nothing again. Then he arrived in a certain country where he heard that a king's daughter had died. "Oh, ho!" thought he. "That might be a good thing for me.

I will bring her back to life and see that I am paid properly." So he went to the king and offered to bring the dead girl back to life. Now the king had heard that a discharged soldier was traveling around and bringing dead people back to life, and he thought Brother Lustig was that man.

But since he did not trust him, he consulted his councilors first, who said he could give it a try since his daughter was dead. Then Brother Lustig ordered water to be brought in a kettle, told everyone to leave, cut the limbs off, threw them in the water, and lit a fire under it, just as he had seen St.

Peter do. The water began to boil, the flesh fell off, and then he took the bones out and laid them on the table, but he did not know the right order and placed them all wrong and mixed up.

Then he stood before them and said, "In the name of the most holy Trinity, dead maiden, I command you to arise." He said this three times, but the bones did not move. So he said it three more times, but still in vain.

"Confounded girl that you are, get up!" he cried. "Get up, or it will be worse for you!" When he had said that, St. Peter suddenly appeared in his former shape as a discharged soldier. He entered through the window and said, "Godless man, what are you doing?

How can the dead maiden arise when you have thrown her bones around in such confusion?" "Dear brother, I have done everything to the best of my ability," he answered. "This once, I will help you out of your difficulty, but one thing I tell you: if you ever do anything like this again, it will be worse for you.

And also, you must not ask for or accept the smallest thing from the king for this!" Then St. Peter laid the bones in their correct order, said to the maiden three times, "In the name of the most holy Trinity, dead maiden, arise," and the king's daughter stood up, healthy and beautiful as before.

Then St. Peter went away again through the window, and Brother Lustig was glad that everything had gone so well, but he was very upset that he was not allowed to take anything for it. "I would just like to know," he thought, "what fancy that fellow has got in his head.

For what he gives with one hand, he takes away with the other. It makes no sense at all!" Then the king offered Brother Lustig whatever he wanted, but he did not dare to take anything.

However, by hints and cunning, he managed to make the king order his knapsack to be filled with gold, and with that he left. When he got outside, St. Peter was standing by the door and said, "Just look at you! Did I not forbid you to take anything?

And there you have your knapsack full of gold!" "How can I help it," answered Brother Lustig, "if people put it in for me?" "Well, I tell you this: if you ever do anything like this again, you will suffer for it!" "Eh, brother, don't worry.

Now I have money; why should I bother with washing bones?" "Truly," said St. Peter, "the gold will not last long! So that you don't stray onto forbidden paths again, I will give your knapsack this power: whatever you wish to have inside it, will be there. Farewell!

You will never see me again." "Goodbye," said Brother Lustig, and thought to himself, "I am very glad you have gone off, you strange fellow. I will certainly not follow you." But he forgot all about the magical power of his knapsack.

Brother Lustig traveled with his money and squandered and wasted it as before. When at last he had no more than four kreuzers, he passed by an inn and thought, "The money must go." He ordered three kreuzers' worth of wine and one kreuzer's worth of bread.

As he was sitting there drinking, the smell of roast goose reached his nose. Brother Lustig looked around and peered, and saw that the innkeeper had two geese in the oven. Then he remembered that his comrade had said that whatever he wished for would be in his knapsack, so he said, "Oh, ho!

I must try that with the geese." So he went outside the door and said, "I wish those two roasted geese out of the oven and into my knapsack." As soon as he said that, he unbuckled it and looked inside, and there they were. "Ah, that's right!" he said.

"Now I am a made man!" He went to a meadow and took out the roast meat. While he was eating, two journeymen came by and looked at the second goose, which was untouched, with hungry eyes.

Brother Lustig thought to himself, "One is enough for me," and called the two men over. "Take the goose and eat it to my health," he said. They thanked him, took the goose to the inn, ordered a half bottle of wine and a loaf, and began to eat.

The landlady saw them and said to her husband, "Those two are eating a goose. Look and see if it's not one of ours from the oven." The innkeeper ran and saw the oven was empty. "What!" he cried. "You thieving crew, you want to eat goose so cheaply?

Pay for it this moment, or I will wash you with green hazel sap!" The two said, "We are not thieves. A discharged soldier gave us the goose out there in the meadow." "Don't try to fool me! The soldier was here, but he left through the door like an honest fellow.

I saw him myself. You are the thieves and you will pay!" Since they could not pay, he took a stick and beat them out of the house.

Brother Lustig went on and came to a place with a magnificent castle, and not far from it a shabby inn. He went to the inn and asked for a night's lodging, but the landlord turned him away and said, "There is no room here.

The house is full of noble guests." "I am surprised they come to you and not to that splendid castle," said Brother Lustig. "Ah," replied the host, "but it's no small thing to sleep there for a night.

No one who has tried it so far has come out alive." "If others have tried it," said Brother Lustig, "I will try it too." "Leave it alone," said the host. "It will cost you your life." "It won't kill me quickly," said Brother Lustig.

"Just give me the key, and some good food and wine." So the host gave him the key, food, and wine. With this, Brother Lustig went into the castle, enjoyed his supper, and when he was sleepy, he lay down on the floor, since there was no bed.

He soon fell asleep, but during the night he was disturbed by a great noise. When he woke up, he saw nine ugly devils in the room, who had formed a circle and were dancing around him.

Brother Lustig said, "Well, dance as long as you like, but none of you must come too close." But the devils pressed nearer and nearly stepped on his face with their hideous feet. "Stop, you devilish spirits!" he said, but they behaved even worse. Then Brother Lustig grew angry and cried, "Hola!

I will soon quiet you down!" He grabbed a chair leg and struck into the middle of them. But nine devils against one soldier were still too many. When he hit those in front, the others grabbed him from behind by the hair and tore it mercilessly. "Devil's crew!" he cried.

"This is too bad. But wait! Into my knapsack, all nine of you!" In an instant they were inside, and he buckled it up and threw it into a corner. Suddenly everything was quiet, and Brother Lustig lay down again and slept until morning.

Then the innkeeper and the nobleman who owned the castle came to see how he had fared. When they saw that he was happy and well, they were astonished and asked, "Did the spirits not harm you?" "The reason they didn't," answered Brother Lustig, "is because I have all nine of them in my knapsack!

You can live in the castle again quietly. They will never haunt it again." The nobleman thanked him, gave him rich presents, and asked him to stay in his service, promising to provide for him for life. "No," replied Brother Lustig, "I am used to wandering.

I will travel on." Then he left and entered a smithy. He laid the knapsack with the nine devils on the anvil and asked the smith and his apprentices to hit it. So they struck with their great hammers with all their strength, and the devils howled pitifully.

When he opened the knapsack afterwards, eight of them were dead. But one that had been lying in a fold was still alive. It slipped out and went back to hell. Then Brother Lustig traveled for a long time. Those who know him can tell many stories about him.

But at last he grew old and thought about his end. So he went to a hermit who was known to be a pious man and said, "I am tired of wandering. Now I want to behave so that I will enter the kingdom of Heaven." The hermit replied, "There are two roads.

One is broad and pleasant and leads to hell. The other is narrow and rough and leads to heaven." "I would be a fool," thought Brother Lustig, "if I took the narrow, rough road." So he set out and took the broad and pleasant road.

He eventually came to a great black door, which was the door of Hell. Brother Lustig knocked, and the doorkeeper peeped out to see who was there. When he saw Brother Lustig, he was terrified, for he was the very same ninth devil who had been shut up in the knapsack and escaped with a black eye.

He quickly pushed the bolt back in, ran to the devil's lieutenant, and said, "There is a fellow outside with a knapsack who wants to come in. For your lives, do not let him in, or he will wish the whole of hell into his knapsack.

He once gave me a terrible hammering when I was inside it." So they called out to Brother Lustig to go away, because he would not get in there. "If they won't have me here," he thought, "I will see if I can find a place in heaven, because I must be somewhere." So he turned around and went on until he came to the door of Heaven and knocked.

St. Peter was sitting nearby as doorkeeper. Brother Lustig recognized him at once and thought, "Here I find an old friend; I will get on better." But St. Peter said, "I truly believe you want to come into Heaven." "Let me in, brother. I must get in somewhere.

If they would have taken me into Hell, I would not have come here." "No," said St. Peter, "you shall not enter." "Then if you will not let me in, take your knapsack back, for I will not have anything from you." "Give it here, then," said St. Peter.

So Brother Lustig handed the knapsack through the bars into Heaven, and St. Peter took it and hung it beside his seat. Then Brother Lustig said, "And now I wish myself inside my knapsack." In a second he was inside, and thus in Heaven, and St.

Peter had to let him stay there.